With Natalie Dekel, MPhil.‎

Today we’ll do a meditation to discover the true honest self that lies within us. So often it’s so much ‎easier to look outside and judge others for what they have, how they behave, what they think; how ‎they treat their emotions, how they treat emotionally other people. And personally, I find it very hard ‎to actually be extremely, totally honest with myself and see what I’ve got, what I have suppressed, ‎what I don’t want to face.‎



So in this meditation I’m going to ask to work on total honesty with ourselves, with myself; and I ‎welcome you to join me on this process of discovery. Wishing you the most beautiful journey – healing ‎journey. Thank you.‎

We shall start by sitting down or lying down, whatever you prefer that will allow you to relax ‎completely without being disturbed for the duration of our meditation. Take a deep breath… and allow ‎your body to relax.‎

Notice that with each breath you take, you’re looking more inwardly. Your body breathes deeper. And ‎with each inhale, you allow that healing energy to come in. Each breath is the healing energy of life in ‎itself.‎

The next deep breath you take, suspend it for the moment in your heart and then push it all the way ‎down as you exhale to your root chakra and down into the earth, into your roots as a being.‎

Feel the energy exploding into the universe, cleansing your body. And as you breathe in again another ‎deep breath you do the same process. You’re holding it in your heart a moment. Illuminate your heart ‎with it and then push it down to your roots, deep through your body through each chakra down into ‎the earth so that it will become the living fountain of energy… the energy of life.‎

Feel your mind relaxing and become soft, focused on the now. If it strays to think about someone else ‎or something else, you’re leaking away your energy so draw it gently back to focus on the now. We ‎need all the energy we have on order to see who we are.‎

And as our body relaxes more and more into the being of now, I suggest we start by looking at the ‎base chakra. The base chakra is around your perennial floor. That’s the basic needs of your being, the ‎first stage of your development as human being; the physical body, the needs, the emotional ‎foundations.‎

And as we’re going to look at it we’re going to see a beautiful mirror with a red frame. It is up to you ‎what shape it takes but whatever shape you see is the one that means something to you. For instance ‎if it’s a star, think what type of star it is. Is it sharp, spiky or smooth, embracing. Is it a circle, a flower ‎shape, an oval? Each one has a meaning for you specifically and you will know what it means for you ‎because of what that shape represents for you.‎

Mine is an oval. To me it represents rebirth, egg, the beginnings, the foundation, being protected…‎

That mirror that we’re looking in is glazed with a little red glow so at first we cannot see anything in it. ‎But as we continue to sit in the area of the base chakra, breathing deeply into our hearts as we did in ‎the beginning and just observing this mirror. Notice if it’s big, small, what details it has. Is it complete or ‎cracked? Notice everything you can about your mirror of the base chakra.‎

And now I invite you to look into the mirror, ask your higher self, your subconscious mind or whatever ‎you believe in whether it’s God, universe, angels, whatever it is you feel comfortable with. Ask you to ‎show you what is it you need to see on the level of the base chakra. What is the honest, true essence ‎that you need to see and understand?‎

As you continue to look deeply into the mirror, the mirror starts to ripple and get clearer and clearer ‎until you see an image or message or perhaps sound or smell. Whatever the experience, it will be for ‎your highest good and will, what it is you need to know about – honestly, about yourself at that level ‎of your being; at the level of the root/base chakra.‎

You can carry on with your image but if nothing comes to mind you can follow mine. In front of me I ‎see beautiful scenery of rolling green hills. It’s beautiful and calm and it draws me in to step into it, to ‎dissolve into it as if I’m there in that area that I’m looking at.‎

And as I walk, it brings to mind my childhood memories of walking in nature, being surrounded by the ‎hills and trees; the sensations if nature that I used to feel and experience as a child. I felt connection to ‎nature. I felt at peace, safe and protected when I was close to trees and hills.‎

I feel Mother Earth calling me to embrace that connection, to open my heart and come back to this ‎essence of belonging to life, not to the society I’m living in now, not to people that surround me at ‎work, not to any emotional circumstances that I’m spending so much energy on. The connection to ‎earth; that sense of safety, security, support. This is what our true essence in the base chakra is for ‎me; I am supported and loved unconditionally as a daughter of life, of earth just as life would love any ‎tree or being or animal or any existing being because it is part of life, part of who she is.‎

I’m breathing in that sense of confidence, this rootedness that allows me to flourish because if I’m ‎safe, secure, if nothing threatens me I can be who I am. ‎

My back feels supple, my body feels fluid and powerful and strong. And no matter what my age is I ‎feel I can do anything at all. I can dance, I can run I can fly; whatever I really want to do.‎

And now life wants to ask me what is it I really want to do. What is it I’ve loved doing as a child and I’ve ‎forgotten or ignored or regretted or…despise now because I was told there’s something better, ‎something I should be doing or must be doing. What is it that I was really good at and love doing, that I ‎enjoy doing it?‎

The answer comes quickly to you. It might be a memory, a thought but your heart will know this is it. ‎And it’s so simple and easy that you might disregard it but hold onto that because whatever comes so ‎easily to you, it’s your talent, your passion. This is who you truly are. This is your own self saying to you, ‎‎“Hey, don’t ignore your talents. Don’t ignore who you are because no one else on this planet can do ‎this… not in the same way as you. Not in the same passion, energy and expression as you. ‎

You are a unique, loved, successful being of Mother Earth. And you deserve to shine like there’s no ‎tomorrow…because there isn’t tomorrow, there’s only now. There’s no past. And the only thing that ‎clings to the past is our brain. So if your brain keeps going back to thoughts, emotions, places just ‎switch if off and focus on the now. Click on it like switching off a light and back to the now, to the sense ‎of being safe and secure, grounded and supported in what you really passionately want to do.‎

The mirror is going back in ripple and is coloured through red, foggy again. It’s asking us to step back, ‎back into the energy fountain as we move up to the sacral level which is on a physical level an inch or ‎two under your belly button. And the energy in this area is orange.‎

And now as you look at the mirror on that level, observe its shape; observe the meaning of that shape. ‎My mirror looks triangle pointing upwards. To me this means the connection between the physical and ‎the spiritual, between me and others. The way I connect to my environment; to the family, to people, ‎to society. How do I connect my being to those around me?‎

And so I continue to breathe in that orange energy and wait for the mirror to become clearer and ‎clearer, exploring the shape of it until when it’s possible, I’m going to look inside the mirror and see ‎what happens there for me on the level of sacral energy.‎

You can carry on with what you see and if you want, if you don’t have an alternative you can my story ‎and see if it’s applicable to you. What I see is desert. Dry, hot sand and to me it signifies that I’ve been ‎so busy giving to others or trying to please others that I’ve starved the beautiful plant that was me, the ‎tree that was my foundation in the base chakra. And now all I see is the sand, the dunes, not a green ‎leaf in sight. And it’s asking me to stop giving to others. To focus on myself. Not because I’m selfish ‎but because I’ve ignored myself to the point that I’m becoming unwell.‎

As we live in a physical reality, the law of physics demands osmosis when you give and receive. You ‎cannot only give or only receive. It is not a natural law of how the dynamics work. Therefore if you are ‎a giver, you need to stop and allow yourself to receive without guilt, shame, blame or any other ‎negative emotions we’ve been taught to associate with self-treatment, with self-love.‎

And as I speak, the subject makes my heart ache so here I feel that the honesty demands to say I ‎need to learn to love myself more.‎

My sacral chakra is starved for love. It needs to be nourished and treated with gentleness and ‎kindness. And I’m sending it a huge amount of love now for mine and anyone else for whom it’s ‎applicable… until the ground becomes soaked with this green loving energy of love. And I continue to ‎pour move into that sacral area until I will see that little green shoots start to appear. Until I know that ‎I’ve made a foundation for life to begin; that I will respect myself from now on to receive self-love, to ‎receive nourishment. ‎

And most importantly, to release that condition that I decided to adopt as a child that I need to wait for ‎someone else to love me, to look after me, to give me what I need. Because no one apart from me will ‎know honestly, totally, absolutely what I need.‎

Only I know what I need and therefore I can provide what I need …and I already have it. We are self-‎maintaining beings just like earth is. Now I’m learning to rely on myself to supply my needs.‎

I learn to love myself and nourish myself and I learn not to blame myself if I see burned trees instead ‎of green ones, if I see dry sand instead of beautiful green hills. This was my learning experience and it ‎made me who I am now and for that I am grateful. So now I can love myself even more because I ‎deserve it and because I am the best for this task that life has given me. It works that way.‎

If oxygen reacts with another molecule and it causes an explosion, it does not berate itself or dwell in ‎self-guilt and self-blame for the result. It simply attaches itself to hydrogen and becomes water, the ‎nourishment of love and life. Or it oxygenates your blood or whatever else it can do. With mere ‎thoughts and emotions we have the tools to be destructive or creative.‎

And it is up to us now to decide what aspect of the self do we want to experience?‎

‎2015 is going to be a year of action where we manifest what we have learned; where you have to do ‎what you want or achieve or receive. So here I embrace myself and I vow to love myself utterly and ‎completely, accepting myself as I am. And I vow to release guilt, blame regrets and any other negative ‎emotions that drain me of this beautiful love and light that is pouring into that desert now, creating an ‎oasis in the middle of the desert.‎

If you look in the mirror, it is possible that the shape has changed after this work…‎

You might want to carry on pouring love and light into that area until the mirror shapes into what you ‎wish to see it as. So for example, my triangle is now more close to an oval. It still has sharp edges but it ‎is metamorphing into an oval.‎

And as we carry on to another chakra, know that your body continues to work on the previous ones ‎and continues to heal and shift the energy because we are carrying on with the fountain of love, ‎fountain of being through us with each breath we take.‎

And now we’re shifting to the level of the solar plexus. And as we sit in front of the solar plexus ‎mirror… it’s around your sternum the solar plexus area… notice if the yellow glow is dull or bright, ‎golden, reddish, darker or brighter. Notice the texture, shape of it…‎

And as you look into the mirror pay attention to what you see. See the mirror clears up with the fog of ‎the energy and look into that area to see what the message is for you.‎

The message I got for me – and I know it will be applicable to many others is: you are not alone. ‎Sometimes it feels like we are going against the string of life, that we’re battling in a circle; that all the ‎investments, the efforts, the hard work seems never-ending and we feel alone struggling in this ‎wheel of never-ending tasks that doesn’t seem to improve or change. ‎

And yet if you look back, you will notice that every so often there would be a break in that circular ‎motion. There will be a little miracle, whether it’s somebody being kind to you in the street, stopping ‎to greet you good morning with a smile. You started feeling bad and suddenly somebody just smiles at ‎you. Or perhaps an unexpected surprise; a present, a gift, a kind word, a hug…‎

Life tells us we are not alone. We never have been and will never be. Just as the molecules are ‎working in different groupings they’re continuously, constantly shifting and rearranging themselves, ‎even in the same structure. The stone is never the same stone. It’s constantly shifting, changing, ‎evolving. Mountains change and evolve. The trees change and evolve. It may look the same; it is not ‎the same. So we as a being are never the same, are never alone but all part of one big, large existence ‎that’s constantly shifting, evolving, changing.‎

The only thing that may think is stuck is the illusory programming of our mind, since our mind is only ‎working as a backup situation to bring past experience for us to get an outcome on a physical level. It ‎cannot see the future or assess the now. And relying on the rear view of past events indeed will keep ‎you in a circle. But if you break the looking into that circuit of thinking with mind and just observe your ‎present, carefully, thoroughly observe what you are doing now, where you are now, who is with you ‎now, what is happening to you now, you will see a change. Every moment by moment there is a ‎different event, different emotion, different situations as variations; those change.‎

Pay attention to these changes because the change is building up and soon it will manifest into a bigger ‎change and a bigger change until the mountain will shift, the trees will change…you will change.‎

You are drawn back to the fountain of life. And we’re shifting to the level of the heart.‎

And now as we sit in the chambers of heart, look around you. In this chamber the mirrors surround ‎you completely. The whole chamber is surrounded with mirrors; above you, below you, around ‎you…infinite numbers of mirrors in gorgeous green frames.‎

What do you see? What does it make you feel seeing yourself in so many ways at the same time? Are ‎you happy to see yourself? Are you ashamed? Are you judgmental? What do you feel seeing yourself? ‎What does it mean to you?‎

I see myself in different periods of time all at the same time because past has never been and every ‎time I’ve grown up, grow older, that being exists parallel to me right here, right now. They’re all alive in ‎me. They all have their experiences and it is up to me to love them and soothe them and offer them ‎companionship or parenthood or support, whatever they need whether it’s you as a tiny baby or you ‎as a grown-up. You’re there for you.‎

And all these selves of you waiting to be loved, listened, appreciated and supported. One of them is ‎catching your eye again and again. Who is it? How old were you then? What happened? What does ‎that aspect of yourself need? Speak to them. Have a little conversation, give them a hug.‎

Tell them how much you appreciate and honor and respect them, and love them and accept them just ‎as they are…and how proud you are of them.‎

Tell them that you are here for them always from now on.‎

And as you send this love to that aspect of self and all the other infinite number of selves in the ‎mirrors, the chamber swells with love. It breathes and beats with bits of life and each beat spreads ‎love further, deeper…so with each heartbeat you’re spreading the love. You’re enlarging your heart. ‎You’re expanding on your love so that it encompasses all aspects of your being; all the cells in your ‎body, all the expression of yourself in this lifetime… your house, your street, your country… fill it with ‎love, with your light.‎

Now we’re being drawn back into the fountain of life moving up into the level of the throat. Look the ‎mirror there. It should be pale blue, blue colour. Pale or dark depends on you, and what you ‎experience in this moment. Observe the mirror. Is it full or broken? Is it the shape you wanted it to be ‎or perhaps an unusual shape? Look into the mirror and see what it’s got to tell you.‎

My mirror in this area is broken. It tells me that I have not spoken the words I wanted to many years ‎ago. But instead or regretting or being upset about the unspoken words, I’m going to heal the mirror ‎by sending it more love and by allowing the inner self to express itself in whatever way it chooses from ‎now on. I’m accepting everything it has to say even if it’s silly or inappropriate or whatever it is that ‎comes out of it. I allow it to speak up. I’m proud of it and I love it for speaking up. I forgive it for not ‎speaking up or for speaking things that perhaps I regretted saying.‎

I allow the throat mirror to heal. The unspoken words can come out as sounds of music, birds, flowers, ‎whatever feels right for you. In my case I see a little shoot of flowers start to come up in the image in ‎the mirror. And as it grows in my love, the mirror becomes complete and whole.‎

And across the fabric of life, across past, present and future the broken pieces merge together ‎effortlessly, seamlessly into one complete whole because there’s a power flow to remove the illusion ‎of shape and breakage and allow pure energy to take place.‎

You are powerful beyond belief. You can heal your past; you can change your future by changing ‎yourself now, speaking up your truth at all times and being true to yourself, to that beautiful being ‎that is unique on planet earth. Amongst billions of people there’s only you and there will never be ‎exactly the same again.‎

Send more and more love until you feel complete; until the energy is shining beautifully from that ‎mirror… Perhaps you will have a message that urges you to do something that you were ‎procrastinating or postponing, not wanting to do. This is your message. This is your expression of self. ‎The time has come to be neutrally loved.‎

If you want a different future, if you want results for a financial situation you need to imagine yourself ‎differently. You need to visualize what it is you want from your future emotionally. What do you want ‎to feel and then how do you make yourself feel that?‎

This is you expression of self. This is your communication to the universe of your needs. No one else ‎will know how to fulfill this need. No one can give you what you don’t know what to receive. So you ‎decide now what you want to feel; you feel it and then you ask yourself how do I get to this feeling? ‎What would make me feel like that? Maybe little steps, maybe big steps but you will be guided. ‎Feeling comes first.‎

No we go back to the fountain of life, into the third eye chakra. It’s positioned in between your ‎eyebrows, a little above that. Surrounded with purple indigo light…‎

Observe that energy, observe that mirror. Feel it becoming clearer with each breath you take and dive ‎into that to see what the message is for you.‎

The message I’ve got is that I need to love more those around me because we’re here for a limited ‎time and every moment counts, every moment changes your life. Every moment changes lives of ‎others. Love as if there’s only today. Express yourself fully and honestly. Appreciate and be grateful ‎for what you’ve got, whether it’s something very small or something big. Because the more grateful ‎you are, the more your life changes; the more this growth of life and abundance and prosperity in ‎every area of your life; so we will not be stuck in a desert as I was in my sacral chakra. You will ‎surrounded by the lush greenery of life.‎

So thank you, life, I am grateful. I am grateful to every single cell in my body. I am grateful for my body, ‎for my experience, for my living. I am grateful for life living me. I am grateful for being alive. Thank ‎you…I love you.‎

And now we have gone back into the fountain of life and it explodes in all colours of rainbow; huge ‎firework of energy. And as we come up to the top of our being, it goes down, down our bodies into ‎the earth grounding us with each chakra it passes down, bringing us down into our bodies…down to ‎earth, down to our feet.‎

Notice how the breath comes in and out of your body. Notice your muscles and legs, your feet on the ‎ground or the surface you’re sitting on…‎

Feel your being become grounded, rooted into this reality with all the lessons you’ve learned today. ‎You are amazing. You’re powerful. And there’s only one of you in the whole, wide universe. So take ‎care of that special you.‎

Thank you so much for listening to this meditation. I honor and appreciate your sharing it with me. ‎Thank you.‎

2 Jan 2015
© Natalie Dekel