Listening In

Duysal Aşkun Celik, PhD. interviewed by Gil Dekel, PhD.

Gil Dekel: What do you think happens to the Soul after we die?…

Duysal Aşkun: For me, the soul continues his or her journey, albeit in a different form. The physical body is left behind, and the soul searches to find ways to express him or her in the grander version at that moment.

What is emotion? How would you define emotion…

Emotion is energy in motion, and is a vital tool for the soul to know its experience. For example, if you feel bad about something that happens to you, this is a message from your soul, and you need to use that message to get to know who you are and what you need to change or develop within yourself.

How can we learn to change and develop?

By observing our choices, actions, and their results. If we look carefully, we will see that too much energy is lost when we are blaming other people for our situation. Blaming others is useless. Even if the other person has done something which is not appropriate, such as hurting you, what you feel related to that is your own feeling (no one else’s), and the action is the other person’s action. Your feelings are yours; they are not the other person’s feelings. The actions are the other person’s. Of course, this does not mean we can continue behaving irresponsibly toward others and continue hurting them.

Blaming is not the way to transform or change other people or even yourself. You wish to deal with your emotions, as well as your choices which attracted the situation. Whatever is happening, both parties are involved. You have attracted that experience to you, and the other person behaved that way. What needs to be done now is expressing your feelings without blaming the other.

No one can say anything for your feelings, as they are yours, and you have complete right to express them. When you do not express yourself, rather blame the other, the other reacts with defense, and you have no chance to make him or her understand their role in that interaction.

So, pay attention to the messages coming from your soul, observe your choices and the results, express your emotions… and do not blame others…

How do people ‘attract’ situations to them?

Things never ‘happen’ to the individual. The individual attracts them, creates them, them and makes them happen. This might sound odd as it is hard to take responsibility for our soul’s journey. Our soul has a big history and a future. Your life today is like the tip of the iceberg compared to the life before you were born, and after you die. The family, the country and the community we are born into, and our economic condition at birth – are a result of who we are, and who we have chosen to be before our current life today.

That’s why it is never easy to understand why things happened to us when we were a child. It seems like we had a good or bad destiny, but I think this is not the case. Everything that happened, happens, and will happen to us is a result of who we were, are, and will be. Therefore, we need to start with observing our soul’s grand journey (beyond this life), and start acting/being/thinking/feeling differently today to change our life course.

Our Soul has a journey that comprises past, future, as well as our present life. Can we talk about the present moment – what is ‘the now’?

It is the pinnacle of your past and future… it is all that is going on inside and outside you. There is nothing for us to act upon but the present moment. Your existence, your thoughts, your feelings and actions are only happening in the present moment. They are the culmination of past actions or thoughts, so we need to be aware of past and future – and know that they exists (for us) only in the Now.

‘To stay in the moment’ is a skill to develop as it keeps our energy alive and we are no longer stuck with past or future, which do not exist now.

There are so many positive ideas and well-meant-words out there; but how can we transform them into positive actions?

This is tough. If it was easy, all written books would create a different world by now. Well-meant words are easy to write and express. To be able to transform those words into positive actions, you need to carry the water up the hill as an individual. You need to step beyond your comfort zone and take the next leap to awareness.

Many people would say “I am starting my diet on Monday”, yet Monday comes and they do not do so. People make promises they do not keep. Actions require courage, which you can achieve by letting go of your ego. The ego will try to keep you in your comfort zone. Comfort is leaving things as they are, not changing anything. It is staying still.

To be able to bring actions into our lives and achieve positive results, we need to balance our female and male parts inside each of us. Our female part helps us to go easy with the process, while the male part encourages us to take the action. We need to know, acknowledge and honour the ‘importance of taking the action, really doing it’ while also giving ourselves the ‘time’.

When we go beyond the ego, we then connect to the power inside; and this power is the strength for actions.

What is that power inside?

It is God… it is the ‘Oneness of all Beings in the Universe’. We are always connected to that essence, and we are connected with each other. When we forget our connection and oneness with all beings – including plants, animals, people and every other kind of being – we forget our connection to God.

God expresses her/himself through us, all living beings. God knows him/herself through our experiences. God holds the Creator Power, and if we know how to connect with God inside of us, we can be the creator ourselves.

We can connect through silence. Unfortunately, many people are running away from silence nowadays. The internet and social media make it even worse. People are yearning to connect with others, which is great; however, for self-awareness and individual development, we need silent time for ourselves. With silence, we are able to listen in, to relax and get to know what we feel and think. With silence, we are able to gain the capacity to transform ourselves to live a better life, and create healthier relationships. We can release ourselves from the illusion of needs.

If need is an illusion, why so many of us tap into it and believe in it?

Because we are born with a physical body that has needs. When we are born, we are born with nothing but needs. Physical, sensational and other needs. These are required for the function of the body, however not as a function of our true essence. People tend to confuse the two.

The physical body also creates the separation illusion, together with our evolutionary heritage which influences our genetic make-up. We are full of fear and anxiety because we have it all in our DNAs. Millions and millions of people live and die without realizing that ‘need’ is really an illusion.

Our physical presence creates that illusion of separation. After we are born, we try to understand our mind-body and soul one by one, separately; not as united. The individual has to unlearn that perception of disconnection to reach the understanding of the ‘oneness of his or her being’. This process requires a lot of self-insight, silence, experiential learning, and, finally, transformation.

25 March 2013.
Exclusive Publishing Rights © Gil Dekel. Interview © Duysal Askun Celik and Gil Dekel.
Interview conducted via email correspondence 16 Jan 2013 – 4 March 2013.
Duysal is based in Turkey. Gil is based in The UK. Duysal’s website: www.groupofchange.com